Please enjoy this post from staff writer, Mitchell Pauly. Mitchell writes for SnarkFinance.com and he relaunched his site today. Make sure to check it out!
As I’ve gotten older, I’ve started to recognize things more for what they are and less for what they should be. Over the last five years since college, responsibility has chased me down and molested me, made me feel less like a man and more like the leather clad sex slave in Pulp Fiction. During these times the weight of adulthood makes my knees buckle, my head spin, and entire stretches of days go black—it’s as if life slipped me rohypnol and was very gentle. I have been lucky; so far there hasn’t been any collateral damage, no evidence that any abuse took place, and so I push the shame deep down inside and wonder how I can prevent similar events from happening again. Then my life goes black once more.
A week used to be like a beloved sitcom for me; various episodes filled with shenanigans, women, jokes, drinking and mishaps. My life now is more like the ancient educational films I used to watch in grammar school: boring, worn and slightly racist. I have trouble remembering what I did the weekend before. Also, I have trouble remembering what I did the weekend before. It is a sad state of affairs, if it weren’t for the vibrate function on my cell phone I would have no sex life at all. I have met a wonderful girl and we are engaged. She is lovely and thoughtful, the other day she said she was going off birth control. She said looking at me was enough.
Adulthood has a way of forcing itself upon you; it must be great friends with responsibility. While my priorities used to be women, snowboarding, gym and career -in that order, they are now whatever life dictates they should be. I feel like I am driving a car with shot brakes, trying to avoid a collision, always reacting to the changing road conditions rather than steering the vehicle to safety. To boot, the vehicle is a beater because I am trying to save money. My priorities now extend years in the future, and this makes them feel less tangible “in the now.” I am nothing if not for whom I will be.
That is an exhausting way to live.
How I am Fixing Things: Be Irresponsible
I have surrendered myself to adulthood; a life that is like a syndicated marathon of your favorite show that only plays the boring episodes. However now I have a rule: once a day, I try to do something slightly irresponsible. I am not talking something on the level of placing my balls on my boss’s mouse or keyboard. No, something more inane—I have stolen a cup of coffee from the executive area (the only people in the office building who get free coffee), I have blown off 30 minutes of work by leaving for the gym early (which is in the same building, so leaving my computer open at my desk makes it look like I am off to the bathroom), I have forced myself to mid-week concerts despite the sleep deprivation, or simply bought an ice coffee. These things make me feel a little younger, a little more the Mitchell- of-days-past.
You should try it
Try it. Try being irresponsible. Don’t jeopardize your marriage, relationship with your kids or your career, but try it. Do something once a day that could be deemed mildly irresponsible. It will make you feel younger. It will make you feel more connected to your youth, and will hopefully make you feel like you haven’t let that person down. The younger you could never have guessed what adulthood would be like; that would be like guessing the end to LOST. Being a little irresponsible is like dropping bread crumbs throughout your week, each one a little moment that makes your life easier to remember for yourself. Also, it will make your life easier to remember for yourself.
So think about that.
 That kids, is called “dark humor”.
Is this how you feel about adulthood? How has adulthood changed your perception of reality?